The #1 Cartoon Injury Law Firm in Albuquerque

Have you painted a fake tunnel on the side of a mesa? Only to be run over by a real train coming out of that tunnel?

At Avery Jones and Maltese, we see it all the time. And we know how to get you paid. Hit by a falling anvil or piano? It happens all too often. And we’ll get you PAID! Smashed violently into the ground, face first, by a catapult when all you wanted to do was get in a catapult and be safely catapulted through the air? Not too much to ask! Fell down a 10,000 foot canyon because the flapping wings you bought flapped but did not provide any kind of upward thrust whatsoever! You’re not alone! We help lots of 10,000 foot canyon fall victims every day! And we know how to get you PAID! 

“We won’t rest until people are able to attach bicycle handlebars to a rocket, straddle that rocket, and light the wick of that rocket without having to worry about their safety.”

-Kevin Avery, Co-Founder

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Legal Services

Flattenings

Have you been hit by a falling anvil on the top of your head, causing a single pointy bump to protrude up from the top of your skull with birds flying around it in circles? Getting hit in the skull by a falling anvil can be painful! Come to Avery, Jones and Maltese and we’ll get you PAID! 


Bad Gravity

Have your rocket skates blasted you off the edge of a mesa, where you hover in mid air momentarily, just long enough to look down, before falling 10,000 feet down to the canyon below which is filled with 100 percent pointy rocks? That can hurt! And we know how to get you PAID!

Divorce

We also do divorces!

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GET $10 OFF YOUR FIRST CATAPULT LAWSUIT with discount code SPINALINJURY10.

Our Results Speak for Themselves

  • $78

    Recovered for Acme Cinno-mints Victim

  • $118

    Recovered for Wrecking Ball Body Crush Victim

  • $55

    Recovered for Match Face/Body/Hair Singe Victim

  • $120

    Recovered for Mouse Trap Mangled Finger Victim